The Tao of Letting Go

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The word “Tao” is often translated as “the Way”. Tao represents the natural order of the universe, and the underlying principle that governs all existence and phenomena. Tao is also the source of all things, and the ultimate reality that permeates every aspect of existence.

In Taoism, the goal is to live in accordance with the Tao, to become one with its rhythm and flow. One main principle in Taoism is “Wu Wei”, often translated as “non-action” or “effortless action”. Wu wei is not about inaction, but about taking actions that are in perfect harmony with the Tao. It means acting without force, struggle, or excessive effort, allowing things to unfold naturally.

A commonly used metaphor for this is water.

Water flows effortlessly, adapts to its environment, and nourishes all life without striving. It follows the path of least resistance, embodying the essence of wu wei. By emulating water, one can learn to let go of rigid plans and control, and instead, respond to situations fluidly and intuitively.

Letting go of control is a fundamental aspect of Taoist practice.

Human beings often strive to control their environment, their future, and even other people. This desire for control stems from fear and attachment, leading to stress, anxiety, and conflict. Taoism teaches that true power and freedom come from relinquishing this need for control.

Letting go does not mean passivity or resignation, but a shift in focus. Instead of forcing outcomes, one learns to trust the natural course of events, adapting and flowing with them.

Here’s how to let go of the need to control:

1. Be aware of your resistance. The existence of your resistance means that there is either something you are attached to and is afraid to lose, or an unpleasant situation you are trying to avoid.
2. Acknowledge your attachment or aversion.
3. Allow yourself to feel the pain and the fear. Release the negative emotions in healthy ways.
4. Place your trust in the Tao, the universe, and allow what-is to be, without resistance, without the need to control.
5. Learn to be grateful for what you have. This helps to re-direct your focus to something positive.

Repeat step 1 to 5 over and over, until it becomes easier and easier. The more you let go of the need to control outcomes, the happier and lighter you will become, as you learn to be one with the flow of Tao.